Mind create stress, the more stress you are about success, the less successful you will be
<61-year-old self-made millionaire: 4 things I regret wasting money and time on in my 20s>
1. Drugs and alcohol
If I could go back in time, I’d tell my younger self: “Your education doesn’t stop after college.”
After graduating high school, I became obsessed with all the wrong things. I spent money on drugs and alcohol — and even developed an addiction problem. I should have been spending that money on things that would help me develop new skills, gain knowledge and make powerful connections.
In the real world, your high school diploma is useless, and your college degree won’t get you very far if you don’t have the right skills to keep up with the marketplace. Investing in yourself will only make you more valuable and increase your earning potential.
I didn’t realize any of this until much later. At 25, I spent my last $3,000 on an audio program that taught me about sales and how to close deals. I can honestly say that the investment and commitment to go “all in” are the reasons for my success today.
Kevin O’Leary says that taking a gap year to travel is a bad idea — and I couldn’t agree more. I took so much time off early in my entrepreneurial career that it almost derailed me. I was also spending money I didn’t have on airfare, hotels and food.
A lot of millennials today find themselves in a similar position. They have the urge to travel because they have no purpose at work. They believe time off will help them find that “something” that’s missing in their careers. When you don’t know what you should be doing, it’s easy to put life on hold, go backpacking, stay in hostels and eat ramen.
I’m not saying you can’t ever take any time off. I can travel the world in my own plane today because I ultimately decided to put in the hard work. Get obsessed with your purpose, and you’ll find that your travel plans can wait. Comfort is the enemy of abundance. Don’t let an $800 ticket to Europe get in the way of your freedom.
3. Sleeping in
When you’re young, it’s easy to be lazy and not feel guilty about it. But guess what? The rich and successful get a good night’s rest, but they don’t sleep in.
Let everyone else in their 20s sleep like they’re rich. You should be up at the crack of dawn.
One of my biggest regrets was not taking advantage of all the hours in a day. I allowed myself to feel content when I should have been mapping out my goals and figuring out how to achieve them. Had I realized my full potential in my 20s, I would reached my first million a lot sooner.
Let everyone else in their 20s sleep like they’re rich. You should be up at the crack of dawn. Speed is power, and when you’re young, patience is not a virtue. Today’s marketplace is changing at the speed of light, so you need to be nimble to get ahead.
4. Being too comfortable in my jobs
I wasted half of my 20s working low-paying jobs that didn’t challenge me to grow and develop valuable skills. I’m not saying low-paying jobs are bad; sometimes you have to start a lower salary. But being content and without any drive won’t make you successful in life.
I used to work at McDonald’s making $7 an hour. For me, it was simply a way to make money. But for the guy working next to me, it was a way to learn the business and one day open 100 franchises. The “why” is important. I didn’t know my “why,” so I was essentially wasting my time. My co-worker wasn’t.
You should constantly be asking yourself, How can I earn more money? It might mean asking for a raise, switching to a new job with a higher salary or taking on a side hustle. Be a money fanatic.
The acceptance of the idea that eight hours invested in your job is enough regardless of your financial position is a misunderstanding of epic proportions.
Grant Cardone is the best-selling author of “The 10X Rule” and CEO of seven privately held companies. He also travels the world consulting Fortune 500 companies, small business owners, startups and governments on business expansion. In 2017, he was included in Forbes’ list of 25 Marketing Influencers to Watch.
<Harvard professor says ‘winning a $20 million lottery won’t make you happier in life’—but these 4 things will>
1. Friends and family
Developing a close bond with people we trust and confide in is essential to our overall well-being. “Choose your friends wisely and celebrate everything small and good with them,” Chopra says.
Many others have stressed the importance of having deep and meaningful relationships. “The world is suffering from an epidemic of loneliness,” former U.S. Surgeon General Vivek Murthy wrote in a 2017 Harvard Business Review article. “If we cannot rebuild strong, authentic social connections, we will continue to splinter apart — in the workplace and in society.”
“The ability to forgive frees you from the burdens of hate and other unhealthy emotions that can negatively impact your happiness quotient,” says Chopra.
He cites Nelson Mandela as a hero who truly mastered the art of forgiveness. In 1990, when the legendary freedom fighter emerged from his 27 years of prison, he was asked whether he had any resentment toward his captors.
“I have no bitterness, I have no resentment. Resentment is like drinking poison and then hoping it will kill your enemies,” Mandela responded.
Anyone who’s ever felt they’ve been mistreated (most likely each and every one of us) knows that the act of forgiving can be challenging. But Karen Swartz, director of the Mood Disorders Adult Consultation Clinic at The Johns Hopkins Hospital, says that “making a conscious decision to let go of negative feelings whether the person deserves it or not” can lead to more than just increased happiness.
Resentment is like drinking poison and then hoping it will kill your enemies.
Studies have found that it can also lower the risk of heart attack, improve cholesterol levels and reduce blood pressure, anxiety, depression and stress.
Chopra says that getting involved with charities and donating money to help others is one of the most fulfilling ways to spend your time and money. Researchers have even suggested that people who volunteer experience greater happiness, higher self-esteem and a lower mortality rate.
A study from the University of Chicago and Northwestern University found that giving, rather than receiving, leads to long-term happiness. In one experiment, 96 participants were given $5 every day for five days — with the option to either spend it on themselves or on others.
“Everyone started off with similar levels of self-reported happiness,” the researchers wrote. “Those who spent money on themselves reported a steady decline in happiness over the five-day period. But happiness didn’t seem to fade for those who gave their money to someone else.”
“There’s a wonderful anonymous quote that goes, ‘If you don’t know the language of gratitude, you’ll never be on speaking terms with happiness,’” Chopra tells the audience.
Practicing gratitude can be as simple as saying “I’m grateful” at least once a day. In fact, one study from the American Psychological Association found that doing so can help people savor positive experiences, cope with stressful circumstances and strengthen relationships.
Happiness flows not from physical or external conditions, such as bodily pleasures or wealth and power, but from living a life that’s right for your soul, your deepest good.
“Taking time to think about what you’re grateful for makes you more aware of the positive things in your life,” says Chopra. As a result, “it makes you less biased by the fewer negative things in your life.”
Kyle Young is a freelance creative writer and author of “Quitterproof: The 5 Beliefs of Highly Successful People.” He has also written for Fast Company and Harvard Business Review.